RITCHIE | You enjoying the play? |
---|---|
BARTLET | I am. How about you? |
RITCHIE | We just got here. We were at the Yankee game. We were, you know, hung up in traffic. |
BARTLET | Yeah, I know. Listen, politics aside, and I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but you probably insulted the church, and you can head it off at the pass if you speak to the Cardinal tonight. |
RITCHIE | Well, I didn't mean to insult anybody. |
BARTLET | No. |
RITCHIE | And it's a baseball game. It's how ordinary Americans... |
BARTLET | Yeah. No, I don't understand that. The center fielder for the Yankees is an accomplished classical guitarist. People who like baseball can't like books? |
RITCHIE | Are you taking this personally? |
BARTLET | No. Something horrible happened about an hour ago. C.J. Cregg was getting threats so we put an agent on her. He's a good guy. He was on my detail for a while, and he was in Rosslyn. He walked in the middle of an armed robbery, and was shot and killed after detaining one of the suspects. |
RITCHIE | Oh. Crime. Boy, I don't know. |
BARTLET | We should have a great debate, Rob. We owe it to everyone. When I was running as a governor, I didn't know anything. I made them start Bartlet college in my dining room. Two hours every morning on foreign affairs and the military. You can do that. |
RITCHIE | How many different ways you think you're gonna find to call me dumb? |
BARTLET | I wasn't, Rob. But you've turned being unengaged into a Zen-like thing, and you shouldn't enjoy it so much is all, and if it appears at times as if I don't like you, that's the reason why. |
RITCHIE | You're what my friends call a superior sumbitch. You're an academic elitist and a snob. You're, uh, Hollywood, you're weak, you're liberal, and you can't be trusted. And if it appears from time to time as if I don't like you, well, those are just a few of the many reasons why. |
BARTLET | They're playing my song. [stands to return to the theatre] In the future, if you're wondering, "Crime. Boy, I don't know" is when I decided to kick your ass. |
And doesn't Ritchie's last line in this scene sound both an awful lot like what is spewing forth from the Heffalumps... and what passes for the thought process of a sixth-grade bully?